YOUR TODDLER’S DEVELOPMENT : AN INTRODUCTION

Is my child ‘normal’?

It might not be a politically correct question to ask, but it ultimately is one that all parents ask themselves at some point or other. Every child is different and a better way of looking at child development is as a set of guidelines, rather than hard and fast rules.

As part of our new series, looking at some of the milestones of your toddler’s development, we thought we’d start off by dealing with some of the issues involved in looking at child development. Timelines showing development milestones are incredibly popular (and useful) with new parents, but what if your child isn’t able to say their name when the timeline says they are “supposed” to? Are these milestones set in stone? ? Is there such a thing as “normal”?  And what if your child shows signs of developing more slowly than the timelines indicate?

These are all important questions for the parents of toddlers. Even more important when you are faced with a competitive parent who wants to tell you how wonderful their child is – already doing algebraic Maths by the age of three.

Here, then, are some considerations you might like to make before diving further into the subject of child development…

1. 1) Child development milestones vary widely.

The ages given on development timelines are not set in stone. It’s quite common to have areas of late development, such as late walkers or talkers. Many of the individual differences between the development of babies and children is programmed genetically – so don’t be a competitive parent!

1. 2) Milestones are a range, not a deadline!

When using development milestones to look at, for example, when your child should be walking, remember that these are made up from taking an average of many children. Some will learn to walk more quickly, some will learn to walk more slowly – both are completely normal. In fact, if your child hits every milestone exactly on cue, he/she’s probably the odd one out!

1. 3) Delays in development are OK.

Don’t panic if your child seems to be developing more slowly in some areas than others. It may be because they were born prematurely or because they are twins / triplets.

4)  If you are concerned, see your doctor.

A minority of babies / toddlers will have delays in development that may need specialist help. Doctor and health professionals should always take seriously any worries that you have about your child. If in doubt, see your doctor.

5) Try to avoid the word ‘normal’.

This is incredibly hard to do, when talking about child development and may seem too politically correct. However, if your toddler has special educational needs you will want to encourage them that they are no different than other children in so many ways. You will want to build their self-esteem and give them the confidence to be proud of who they are. Having a label ‘not normal’ is a terrible label to give a child. Each toddler is unique and a blessing in their own right. Try to refer to them as such!

Knowing child development milestones is vitally important if you, as a parent, are to be aware of how your child is growing. If you know approximately where your child should be, you can quickly spot any development issues and seek help from a health professional.

In the coming weeks we’ll be focussing on some of the key milestones in your child’s development. We hope that they’re useful and we trust that you’ll read them in the light of the above!